“Daddi, I’m going out for a while. I’ll be back soon.”
“Should you be leaving the house, Rinpoche? I thought you said that cats were still under lockdown?”
“No offence, Daddi, but I need a break from being cooped up in the house, listening to you and Mummi arguing with each other.”
“Nonsense, Rinpoche! Mummi and I never argue.”
“It certainly sounded like you were arguing today, Daddi. All that unpleasantness was very upsetting to me. I’m a sensitive cat.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Rinpoche. Tell me when you heard us argue.”
“Well, this morning, you asked Mummi what had happened to your favourite socks. You complained that you’d put them in the laundry basket two weeks ago. And I have to say that it sounded like you were blaming Mummi for the disappearance of your socks, Daddi. You told her very accusingly that the socks were nowhere to be found in the drawer in which you keep them.”
“That wasn’t an argument, Rinpoche.”
“I think it was, Daddi, even though a lot was left unspoken. If you recall, Mummi opened your drawer and immediately produced your socks, which were in full sight. Any fool could have seen them!”
“There’s no need to rub it in, Rinpoche.”
“Mummi then held the socks right up to your face and muttered something provocative about men being hopeless at finding things. I’m inclined to agree with her, Daddi.”
“You would. Females always stick together. And this wasn’t a quarrel, Rinpoche. We were just joshing with each other. At worst, the incident could be described as amiable bickering.”
“Well, I don’t like it, Daddi, so don’t ever do this ameowable bickering again! I don’t want to be a cat from a broken home, like Mittens.”
“Do his owners argue a lot?”
“No, they seem very fond of each other. But, thanks to Mittens, everything in his house is broken!”
