The Sad Tale of a Fallen Female

Gwyneth the Ginger fallen Cat

“Rinpoche, that pesky black cat is rummaging through my bin again. And this time, there’s a scruffy ginger cat with him. Look at the mess they’ve made! I’m turning the hose on them.”

“No, Daddi, don’t do it … please! That ginger cat is my best friend, Gwyneth!”

“Gwyneth? You must be mistaken, Rinpoche. Gwyneth is a beautiful, sleek cat. This ginger cat looks scrawny and unkempt.”

“Yes, it’s very sad what’s happened to her, Daddi.”

“Doesn’t Gwyneth live in that big, fancy house a little further up the road?”

“She used to, Daddi … until she met the black cat, Beelzebub, and ran off with him. Do you remember how I recently predicted that Gwyneth would meet a tall, dark, handsome stranger?”

“Well, he’s dark, and I suppose that you could call him tall, but by no stretch of the imagination is he handsome, Rinpoche. He’s covered with scratches and seems to have lost one eye as well as most of his fur.” 

“That’s because he’s the toughest cat in Gloucestershire and has been in numerous fights. But love is blind, Daddi. I’m sure Gwyneth considers him handsome.”

“Your friend, Gwyneth, is really tucking into that small piece of pizza crust she found in my bin! Wasn’t she supposed to be gluten intolerant?”

“So she said, Daddi, and she was always very fussy about her diet. But life on the streets is hard, so now she’s starving and eats anything she can find.”

“Rinpoche, we need to let her owners know where she is. They must be worried out of their minds about her.”

“You can’t tell them, Daddi!” 

“Why not?”

“Gwyneth is the only cat I’ve ever met who has a real pedigree – she’s pampered and admired by everyone. The news that she’s become a fallen woman would bring shame and disgrace upon her owners and her.”

“She’s a fallen cat – not a fallen woman.”

“She’s a fallen female cat, so her reputation would be ruined if anyone found out about Beelzebub. The felines in this neighbourhood can be very catty.”

“So you’re suggesting that we do nothing about this sad situation?”

“That’s exactly what I’m suggesting, Daddi. Gwyneth will soon come to her senses and return home. Nobody will know where she’s been. She may be a fallen woman, but she always seems to land on her feet in the end.”


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